free time and trust

So-


I guess I have really been in a writing mood lately...like 4 blogs in 6 days or something rediculous like that. :) I just have had the time.


So, exams have been going ok. Just hard. Me and school have never really gotten along very well. I don't like school, school doesn't like me and that is that. I try not to think about it much.


With the free time, I have been able to do stuff with my friends. Yesterday, I spent most of the afternoon with my good friend Rachel. we "studied" for our spanish exam...yeah, studied for like treinta minutos, and then chatted and hung out for like tres horas. For you non- spanish speakers, that translates to, we didn't really study at all. :) but, we had a blast none the less. She is moving also and so, honestly hanging out with her is easy, because we are both leaving. Spending time with my other friends can be a challenge because the whole time, all i can think about is how i am leaving them in a short 17 days. And that is really really hard for me. With rach, we are both leaving, so, it is not so hard. If you have moved before, you know what i mean.


Tonite, while mom and dad are away, my sis and i had a bunch of people over, we cooked dinner, bought dessert and then watched a movie. that's what we're doing now. watching a movie, but, i was not into the movie choice, so, i just decided to write instead of watch. after this, it is back to history review. i feel pretty well prepared for it, but, still a bit nervioso. (i feel ready for spanish tho!)


anyways, i have had a lot on my heart lately, but, i am still in the, not so sure how to share it stage. when i figure it all out, you can be sure it will be written, right here. but, right now, i am just writing sort of nonse stuff.


a lot of what is going on is anxiety about moving. don't get me wrong, i am really excited. but, totally getting nervous. what if i don't make friends? who will I be able to talk to? will i do well at my new school? are my friends going to miss me or forget about me? (shallow, i know, but, its what's in my brain) all these things...so many what if's.


sometimes i wonder if God really will prove faithful. there is a bit of unbelief in me right now. what if he just makes me go thru this alone. but, what a stupid thought that is. wanna know how i know that is stupid. check out this scripture and song:


Hebrews 13:8
Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever.


Vicky Beeching puts it like this:


Yesterday today and forever
You are the same
You never change
Yesterday today and forever
You are faithful and we will trust in You


Emphasis on the you are faithful and we will trust in you.


HE IS SO FAITHFUL and when i look back on my life, there is not one single day that isn't drenched in his faithfulness and love and just in him.


So, i shouldn't be afraid...and i am not. i will trust in him to bring me thru.


Thank you jesus for your faithfulness. help me to trust you and love you. i trust you with this move and know you know what is best for me. i love you god!